Teeth Hoarder

Taking good care of my future "Pearly" whites!


Years back, before I had kids, my mom had asked me to help her organize her room. I love organizing and designing so of course I said sure. Part of organization is determining what is useful and what is not useful. Somethings can be kept for memories, but only if those items honor the memory. You cannot keep everything, it just isn't practical.

So we were going through everything, making a keep pile and a throw away pile. I then opened a small shell box and could not believe what I saw. I asked my mom, "Is this what I think it is?" Almost embarrassed she said, "Yes, what's wrong with that?"


What is wrong with keeping a box full of your kids baby teeth? There were a ton in there. Four kids...you do the math! Was she going to make a necklace later? I did not get it. Why would she keep these teeth? She didn't even have fond memories of us pulling them because I remember her being completely grossed out by process.


Now, as a grown adult I make this weird discovery. I tell her she has to throw them out. This is gross. Worse than keeping a nasty lock of hair. I am kinda mean at this point and she starts crying and saying it is hard for her to part with them. I don't get it. I make her throw them away, and now I feel guilty for that, as she was extremely sad to let go of this reminder of when we were babies.

Why do I feel bad? Well, Bryce has started losing his teeth. 5 to be exact! The tooth fairy sneaks in there at night and gives him some money for this token of his childhood. And do you know what that tooth fairy has been doing with the teeth? That's right, they are in a zip lock bag in my drawer. Why, why, why?????

I don't know, but I too cannot bring myself to throw out this memory, that is quite disgusting, but also so sweet. You can't go around throwing away the DNA that makes up your kid, can you? I'm sure some people can- but it's in my genes, I guess, to hoard teeth. I really am going to throw them out...soon! I don't want my grown, adult children to come across this and be as weirded out as I was at my moms. But I get it now....somehow...I get it! Sorry mom, should of made you a necklace! (totally joking that is so gross)

I Wanna Be Absent!

Getting Bryce to go to school is a little like pulling teeth. I think I have made it too comfortable for him here. When I was a kid I couldn't wait to go to school. I would rather be there than at home putting up with my 3 brothers or a screaming mom. But Bryce, wants to stay home. He says it is more fun here, his toys are here and school is dumb and boring. Not Good!

He is still doing very well in school. It is week 4 and he has aced every spelling tests and gotten 100% on all of his math tests. The kid is smart. I would think because he excels he would want to go....nope. Nothing is better than home.

Once we make him get into the car, he is fine but it is the fight to get him to that point that is wearing on all of us. Every morning he asks if he could just be absent. He tells me school is too long, it's too early. He wants to go back to half day like in kindergarten. He says all this in an extremely whining voice. The only good thing he says about ALL day school is two recesses. A boy has to have his priorities.

Since the whining has not been working he has gotten even more creative with the reasons he needs to stay home.

Bryce: "Mom, I wanna be absent. I think I need to stay home, I have a cold."
Me: "I don't think you have a cold...why do you think you do?"
Bryce: "Feel my head I have a fever," he reaches my hand to his forehead. "See it's really cold. I have a fever. I have a cold."
Me: " When you have a fever, your forehead is hot, not cold."
Bryce: "Oh, I guess I don't have a cold then and I'll go to school."

Next excuse was one of my favorites.

Bryce: "Mom, I wanna be absent. I'm sick."
Mom: "What's wrong with you?"
Bryce: "I have allergies and I might be contagious and I don't really want to get my friends sick."
Mom: "Allergies aren't contagious."
Bryce: "OK, I'll guess I'll go then..."

1st grade is a harder adjustment than kindergarten was, it does seem too long to me too. We miss the little guy! I am proud of him for going and doing a good job even though he'd rather stay home. I think if I keep strong sending him and he keeps it up with his 100% I may just let him be absent to go be sick at Disneyland as a reward.

Bon Appetit!

In an attempt to help Bryce become more independent, I have tried to relinquish some control issues I have. The typical stuff, I think. I try to let him pour his own milk, and stay calm when it ends up on the floor. I try to let him wipe his own *ss, even though I worry about him being the smelly kid at school. I try to let him stir the mac n' cheese, feed the dog, tie his own shoe, buckle his own seat belt....well, you get it!

Part of me doesn't want him to be independent for the fear that he doesn't need me as much sets in. On the other hand, I love when he can do things on his own. It makes me so proud and I want him to grow and get big and be independent, just not so fast!

Well, tonight he said he was hungry. I ran through a list of things I could make him for dinner. He said he wanted a cup of noodle soup. I felt like this was a great opportunity to let him be independent. I told him he could make it if he wanted. He got so excited! I didn't help, I just instructed from the sidelines. "Tear off the plastic, fill with water to the line, put it in the microwave and press one. Put in some ice and ENJOY!"

He gets done "cooking" his cup of noodle and there is a smile stretching from ear to ear. He is beaming with pride at his own delicious masterpiece. He says, "You know Mom, maybe I'll be a chef when I get older. I am a really good cook!"

Of course he is and you never know, one day at a five star restaurant near you, you may be able to order an iced down cup of noodle soup from my son, THE CHEF!

Is this Still Good?

Food expiration dates is always something that confuses the heck out of me. Why can't there be a universal way to explain when you shouldn't chance eating the food? I just don't want to get diarrhea or give my family or company a bad case of the BG's (bubble guts). I waste so much food because I would rather play it safe.

If it was so simple, I think I could understand. I am a college educated person and it seems confusing to me. I know those of you reading this may say, "It's not saying much if you are confused." Basically implying that I am dumb. But really try to make sense of it.

There is:

"Best if used by"- does this mean you can still take a chance eating it after that date? How long after can you eat it after the best used by date...a day, week, month? I hate this one. It's like you take your chances past that date because it doesn't say, "It goes bad by this date. DO not EAT." "Or you can eat any date after the 'best by' date but it will be stale." Little more direction, please.

"Freeze or use by"- Now how long can it stay in the freezer? You know that stuff gets freezer burn. What if you buy it and then don't freeze it until the use by date? Is it still good? Say you take it out to thaw months after the use by date but it was in the freezer, how can that still be OK?

"Exp 00/00/0000"- This is pretty self explanatory. Don't eat it after this day. However, we shop at Costco and you don't even open the 2ND or 3rd package by this date. My mom, and several others say it is fine if you haven't opened it. But it doesn't say that on the package. This stuff also goes in the trash. It should say "Exp one month after opened." Can I get some more instructions, this is my tummy we are dealing with?

"Best if eaten within 7 days of opening"- Hot dogs and bologna have a whole separate thing. They have a date and then this message written tiny! Well, can you still eat it past the best by date? Or do you go by the other random date on the package? Who can eat that many hot dogs or bologna in just 7 days?

"00/00/0000" - Again, just a date, I will throw out by that date, unless unopened rule still applies here?

Then you get some food that has a whole set of separate directions. More complex but just as confusing. Like, "Freeze, take out 24 hours before, refrigerate." I mean I think I get it? Then some food spoils before the date listed. I wonder who comes up with these dates and how accurate they really are.

I think the food and drug administration should get their act together and make it universal. "DO NOT EAT AFTER THIS DATE 00/00/0000. PERIOD. Doesn't matter if you freeze, eat within 7 days, take out defrost and freeze again, just make sure it's gone and eaten by this date or throw it away. If you eat this after, you will be sick!" Simple...I think!