Teeth Hoarder

Taking good care of my future "Pearly" whites!


Years back, before I had kids, my mom had asked me to help her organize her room. I love organizing and designing so of course I said sure. Part of organization is determining what is useful and what is not useful. Somethings can be kept for memories, but only if those items honor the memory. You cannot keep everything, it just isn't practical.

So we were going through everything, making a keep pile and a throw away pile. I then opened a small shell box and could not believe what I saw. I asked my mom, "Is this what I think it is?" Almost embarrassed she said, "Yes, what's wrong with that?"


What is wrong with keeping a box full of your kids baby teeth? There were a ton in there. Four kids...you do the math! Was she going to make a necklace later? I did not get it. Why would she keep these teeth? She didn't even have fond memories of us pulling them because I remember her being completely grossed out by process.


Now, as a grown adult I make this weird discovery. I tell her she has to throw them out. This is gross. Worse than keeping a nasty lock of hair. I am kinda mean at this point and she starts crying and saying it is hard for her to part with them. I don't get it. I make her throw them away, and now I feel guilty for that, as she was extremely sad to let go of this reminder of when we were babies.

Why do I feel bad? Well, Bryce has started losing his teeth. 5 to be exact! The tooth fairy sneaks in there at night and gives him some money for this token of his childhood. And do you know what that tooth fairy has been doing with the teeth? That's right, they are in a zip lock bag in my drawer. Why, why, why?????

I don't know, but I too cannot bring myself to throw out this memory, that is quite disgusting, but also so sweet. You can't go around throwing away the DNA that makes up your kid, can you? I'm sure some people can- but it's in my genes, I guess, to hoard teeth. I really am going to throw them out...soon! I don't want my grown, adult children to come across this and be as weirded out as I was at my moms. But I get it now....somehow...I get it! Sorry mom, should of made you a necklace! (totally joking that is so gross)

I Wanna Be Absent!

Getting Bryce to go to school is a little like pulling teeth. I think I have made it too comfortable for him here. When I was a kid I couldn't wait to go to school. I would rather be there than at home putting up with my 3 brothers or a screaming mom. But Bryce, wants to stay home. He says it is more fun here, his toys are here and school is dumb and boring. Not Good!

He is still doing very well in school. It is week 4 and he has aced every spelling tests and gotten 100% on all of his math tests. The kid is smart. I would think because he excels he would want to go....nope. Nothing is better than home.

Once we make him get into the car, he is fine but it is the fight to get him to that point that is wearing on all of us. Every morning he asks if he could just be absent. He tells me school is too long, it's too early. He wants to go back to half day like in kindergarten. He says all this in an extremely whining voice. The only good thing he says about ALL day school is two recesses. A boy has to have his priorities.

Since the whining has not been working he has gotten even more creative with the reasons he needs to stay home.

Bryce: "Mom, I wanna be absent. I think I need to stay home, I have a cold."
Me: "I don't think you have a cold...why do you think you do?"
Bryce: "Feel my head I have a fever," he reaches my hand to his forehead. "See it's really cold. I have a fever. I have a cold."
Me: " When you have a fever, your forehead is hot, not cold."
Bryce: "Oh, I guess I don't have a cold then and I'll go to school."

Next excuse was one of my favorites.

Bryce: "Mom, I wanna be absent. I'm sick."
Mom: "What's wrong with you?"
Bryce: "I have allergies and I might be contagious and I don't really want to get my friends sick."
Mom: "Allergies aren't contagious."
Bryce: "OK, I'll guess I'll go then..."

1st grade is a harder adjustment than kindergarten was, it does seem too long to me too. We miss the little guy! I am proud of him for going and doing a good job even though he'd rather stay home. I think if I keep strong sending him and he keeps it up with his 100% I may just let him be absent to go be sick at Disneyland as a reward.

Bon Appetit!

In an attempt to help Bryce become more independent, I have tried to relinquish some control issues I have. The typical stuff, I think. I try to let him pour his own milk, and stay calm when it ends up on the floor. I try to let him wipe his own *ss, even though I worry about him being the smelly kid at school. I try to let him stir the mac n' cheese, feed the dog, tie his own shoe, buckle his own seat belt....well, you get it!

Part of me doesn't want him to be independent for the fear that he doesn't need me as much sets in. On the other hand, I love when he can do things on his own. It makes me so proud and I want him to grow and get big and be independent, just not so fast!

Well, tonight he said he was hungry. I ran through a list of things I could make him for dinner. He said he wanted a cup of noodle soup. I felt like this was a great opportunity to let him be independent. I told him he could make it if he wanted. He got so excited! I didn't help, I just instructed from the sidelines. "Tear off the plastic, fill with water to the line, put it in the microwave and press one. Put in some ice and ENJOY!"

He gets done "cooking" his cup of noodle and there is a smile stretching from ear to ear. He is beaming with pride at his own delicious masterpiece. He says, "You know Mom, maybe I'll be a chef when I get older. I am a really good cook!"

Of course he is and you never know, one day at a five star restaurant near you, you may be able to order an iced down cup of noodle soup from my son, THE CHEF!

Is this Still Good?

Food expiration dates is always something that confuses the heck out of me. Why can't there be a universal way to explain when you shouldn't chance eating the food? I just don't want to get diarrhea or give my family or company a bad case of the BG's (bubble guts). I waste so much food because I would rather play it safe.

If it was so simple, I think I could understand. I am a college educated person and it seems confusing to me. I know those of you reading this may say, "It's not saying much if you are confused." Basically implying that I am dumb. But really try to make sense of it.

There is:

"Best if used by"- does this mean you can still take a chance eating it after that date? How long after can you eat it after the best used by date...a day, week, month? I hate this one. It's like you take your chances past that date because it doesn't say, "It goes bad by this date. DO not EAT." "Or you can eat any date after the 'best by' date but it will be stale." Little more direction, please.

"Freeze or use by"- Now how long can it stay in the freezer? You know that stuff gets freezer burn. What if you buy it and then don't freeze it until the use by date? Is it still good? Say you take it out to thaw months after the use by date but it was in the freezer, how can that still be OK?

"Exp 00/00/0000"- This is pretty self explanatory. Don't eat it after this day. However, we shop at Costco and you don't even open the 2ND or 3rd package by this date. My mom, and several others say it is fine if you haven't opened it. But it doesn't say that on the package. This stuff also goes in the trash. It should say "Exp one month after opened." Can I get some more instructions, this is my tummy we are dealing with?

"Best if eaten within 7 days of opening"- Hot dogs and bologna have a whole separate thing. They have a date and then this message written tiny! Well, can you still eat it past the best by date? Or do you go by the other random date on the package? Who can eat that many hot dogs or bologna in just 7 days?

"00/00/0000" - Again, just a date, I will throw out by that date, unless unopened rule still applies here?

Then you get some food that has a whole set of separate directions. More complex but just as confusing. Like, "Freeze, take out 24 hours before, refrigerate." I mean I think I get it? Then some food spoils before the date listed. I wonder who comes up with these dates and how accurate they really are.

I think the food and drug administration should get their act together and make it universal. "DO NOT EAT AFTER THIS DATE 00/00/0000. PERIOD. Doesn't matter if you freeze, eat within 7 days, take out defrost and freeze again, just make sure it's gone and eaten by this date or throw it away. If you eat this after, you will be sick!" Simple...I think!

Sit-at-Home Mom

One day, I was running late for my training appointment. It had been one of those days where everything was a going wrong in the morning. Tantrums over breakfast, couldn't find one of Leah's shoes, spilt milk, the whole hectic bit. I don't really care when I'm late. I figure most the world runs about ten minutes behind so if you show up 1o minutes late, you are right on time. I run on what my family jokingly calls "Egyptian Time." Plus, if you have to pick your battles, running late because I am tending to my kids, doesn't bother me.

Anyway I get in late and my trainer, asks why. I tell him it was a rough morning with the kids and try to explain how it is to be a stay-at-home mom. He says sarcastically, "Yeah, being a sit-at-home mom IS hard." Now, initially I wanted to punch him in the face. Then I realized, unless you are a stay-at-home mom, this would be your impression, although I never get to sit for more than 5 minutes.

I also understand where the confusion sets in. For the most part I don't have a schedule to follow. Anyone without kids would think, "SWEET! I can do whatever I want!" The thing is, with kids, your day is dictated by their needs. I do not get to watch the shows I enjoy because they are watching their cartoons. I can get on the computer, but I am interrupted a millions times. "Mom, I need milk." "Mom, I have to go potty." "Mom, he hit me." "Mom, fix this toy."

Even getting ready is tricky. Yeah some days I don't shower until 3 in the afternoon, but that's because it is a chore to do with kids. For a week straight, during the potty training months, Leah would wait until I was in the shower, completely sudded up, to announce she had to go potty. I don't think people without kids have ever had to get out of a shower to wipe an ass. It isn't fun! You feel sticky and cold and soaking wet. I could have told her to wait a second, but if you have potty trained a toddler, you know waiting is only an option if you want a whole new different type of mess to wipe up.

I am not writing all this to complain, even though that is what it seems like. I wouldn't trade this in for anything, but not because it is easy to "sit" at home and watch the kids. I have a different perspective on life now that I have to put my needs second and my kids' needs first. It makes me less selfish, and at times, completely selfless. I don't mind, but to say I sit at home doing nothing is very far from the truth.

Most people without kids, don't get that constant grind of doing things for kids. And I decided that it doesn't make me mad. No not at all. I don't mind if I get looked at like a lazy house wife. I understand that you can't possibly understand until you have kids. That's why I can't wait for the people who think this is a cake walk to have kids, lots of them, or just one really, really mischievous one.

Hillbilly Day!

Mt. Whitney is a place my parents used to take us yearly when we were kids. This last weekend we decided to hop in the car with my mom and dad to take the kids to this cool place. We made a day trip out of it. I hadn't been there since I had my kids and was excited to see it through their eyes.

My dad has recently taken up an obsession with guns. Real ones!! He has bought three guns in the last year, one of them being a 22 rifle for Bryce. I was not sure how I felt about guns. They scare the crap out of me, even more so now that I have kids. You realize the danger or possibility of an accident and it frightens me. My dad reassured me that if I wasn't comfortable, Bryce didn't have to shoot. My dad was reciting gun safety with Bryce since he bought his first one. Then when I would get my panties in a bunch over the guns, Bryce would recite these gun safety rules my dad was teaching him.

It was all pretty effective. I decided that since there was no way of taking all the guns off the earth, knowledge and empowerment was the best way to avoid an accident. I figured that if I banned guns, the curiosity would still be there. I would rather him know what to do if he found a gun at sombody's house, than be curious enough to play with it. When you ask him what to do if he finds a gun, he proudly says, "Go find a grown-up!" Hopefully we take the curiosity away by letting him shoot in an adult controlled environment.

So this trip up to mountain-ville/ hick ville was to be the trip that Bryce got to shoot his 22 for the first time. He was beaming with excitement and joy! The things that makes a boy happy! I was nervous....but he did great. His got 9 out of 10 shot on the target. I was pretty impressed. He was also very protective of Leah and made sure he recited all the gun safety rules to her. It was cute!

I think Bobby also got the gun bug and couldn't stop shooting. He now wants to get a gun. GREAT!! I took a couple shots on the 22 and one on my Dad;s 45, but it really didn't do much for me. I will just cheer from the side lines.

We also got to take the kids fishing at the little pond up there. Bryce has been fishing several times and has never caught anything. I don't even know why he wants to still fish! Growing up at this water hole, I knew that we would probably not catch anything because my brothers tried for years and maybe pulled out a couple tiny fish. He was excited though, so we didn't want to discourage him. Well, it must have been Bryce's lucky day! He pulled in two fishes. Within 5 minutes of dropping our lines, my dad caught one that he let Bryce reel in. Bryce was excited but knew that he wasn't the one to catch that fish. He wanted to catch one all by himself. Bobby says, "Oh, we must have gotten lucky."

Next thing you know, Bryce says, "I got a fish!!!"

Bobby says, "He must just have caught the bottom."

Then he looks and realizes he really did have a fish. Bryce pulls in this huge fish. The excitement was awesome!! He caught his first fish all by himself. We were all buzzing.

After the photo shoot was done he tells his dad in a panicky voice, "OK Dad, put him back now, he's still breathing and I don't want to kill him!" That's my boy. Too sweet. Bobby asked if he was sure we didn't want to eat him, but Bryce was like, "Put him back now Dad."

We roasted marshmallows, sat by a campfire, got to shoot, fish, play in the stream, visit fossil falls, eat some camping food, and look at the amazing stars!! We squeezed all this into one day! Needless to say the kids slept well on the way home. It is days like this that I feel so extremely grateful and content with family life. Bryce said it was his favorite day of his life! The next day we were all feeling lazy and Bryce asked if we knew why he was so calm? We said, "No why?" He said because he got to shoot his gun and go fishing, his two favorite things. We'll have to do this more often!

Beauty Sleep

In our house, the boys are early birds and the girls...well...aren't. It works out good for Leah and me because we get to sleep in while the boys wake up and watch ESPN and make us breakfast. Nice!!

When we first brought Leah home from the hospital we didn't wake up until 10am the next day! I was like, "This is my type of girl!"

Sometimes she is wakened by Bryce but I continue to sleep. Really, this is the time Bobby gets to hang out with them, because he usually works past their bedtime at night. It is a routine I have really come to love! I get some time to myself in the morning and choose to spend it sleeping. In true mom fashion though, I will sometimes feel guilty and wake up and go down to hang out with the family. Most morning I can't even open my eyes wide enough to feel the guilt, so I continue to sleep.

Now, when I say sleep in I am only talking 8am, people! Not like the good ol' teenage days of sleeping in till 11:30. Remember when you just woke up in time to eat lunch? Those days are gone, but sleeping in until 8 is really a treat for most moms.

The other day Bryce asked me, "Mom, why do you like ALWAYS sleep so long in the mornings?"

Of course I felt guilty, but then reminded myself that it is OK for Bobby to take the morning routine, since I have the evening one. Equal partnership...right? I'm all for it!!

I tell Bryce I need to get my beauty sleep in. To that my little charmer says...
"But you are already beautiful!!"

Gotta love my little early bird too! Must only be beautiful because of all that sleep I'm getting...