Does Church Make You a Better Person?

I have always viewed religion as something deeply personal. Something that does not need explanation or flaunting. I believe in letting your life speak for itself. When you love something it shows. I don't know if it is my age (I just past a pretty huge milestone) or if it because my mind does not shut off, but religion has been on my mind a lot lately. I thought writing it out will help me put some of these thoughts to rest. Does church make you a better person? I am not writing this to put people who attend church down. I am writing because this is the question that keeps popping up in my head. I struggle with this.

There are plenty of things I don't understand about religion. I will most likely spend the rest of my life researching the answers. I consider myself deeply spiritual. This doesn't mean I'm too lazy to go to church, but I have a hard time identifying with churches. I attend Catholic church when I go, which isn't often. I am debating about going more regularly, but struggle with many things about that. I was married in this church and my kids were baptised in it. I relate best to this, probably because it is what I know the most about and am familiar with. I am connected to this church through my belief in the bible, my family beliefs and soul searching. I like going and feeling connected to God and others who are believers. It makes my faith stronger.

Even when I do not attend church weekly, I pray, throughout my whole day. My kids say prayers every night. I thank God throughout the day for little things, like feeling healthy, having a car to drive, having money to buy the things we want and need, living in America, feeling connected to my family, etc.

I know verses of the bible and find great comfort in many of them, although I am not an expert and won't quote bible verses from memory. The belief seems to be that if you do not identify with a church and tie yourself to it closely, you are viewed as less religious. I am very secure in my beliefs and what I teach my kids. I don't think it is fair to make comparisons about who is closer to God based on appearances at church. Some people like to shout it from the rooftops and while I do admire that kind of passion, it isn't how I feel more spiritual.

I want my kids to have a strong faith, but there may come a day when they don't. I don't like to think that will happen but they are free to believe what they want. I want them to make their own decisions. I want them to question. I want them to find the answers to their own spirituality. I hope that what I teach them gives them a good enough understanding and faith. I wonder if church will help them or not. I've seen other people become more faithful through church, but I have also seen it make them less.

I struggle so much with many things with church. I'm not in a position to tell others how to live their lives. That is for each individual to decide for themselves. To live for themselves. If they don't believe in God, that is also between them and themselves.

It doesn't affect how I live, or MY relationship with God.

Judgemental attitudes draw me away from church. I have a problem when people feel higher than others based on beliefs. People preach about parts of the bible but leave out other parts. Bottom line, we are all sinners and I don't need to walk around and point out other people's shortcomings. Most of us know where we fall, in regards to where we are with our faith. I don't feel like Jesus would have wanted us to use him to feel superior. I feel that many times people use their voice to preach about the bible but forget to ask themselves how Jesus would have treated some of the people they are preaching about.

There are so many religions. Another thing I struggle with understanding. I don't discredit ones I don't belong to, because there are several interpretations of God's word. I use the bible and it's beautiful verses to live a better life. I want my children to know the love Jesus has for us. I want to use his example to live up to. Although we will all fall short, what a beautiful way to be, with compassion and forgiveness in your heart. I think this can be learned and strengthened through church, but I also feel it can be achieved at home, with less judgement. Do you follow EVERYthing from church or is it interpretive?

If something doesn't make sense to my heart, but it is in the bible, I follow my heart. Because in me, that is where Jesus lives. And Jesus and my heart would not mislead me.

She's a Beaut

There she is! The one he's been waiting for his whole life!! I am excited to announce the newest addition to our family, this truck!! We have been working pretty hard to finally purchase it. I am seriously so excited for Bobby. This is HIS first brand spanking new car. I have had two. He always gets the leftovers. I think it was well worth the wait. He said it was more than he wanted or expected. I know it's just a car but I really wanted to express my joy for Bobby. He is such a hard working guy. He doesn't complain. He sacrifices his personal wants for the better of our family and he doesn't even bring it up. But I notice all the small things he does. He has just been so patient in getting this. It makes me so happy to see him happy.

We traded in the ol' Saturn for her too. It was time. Bryce balled his eyes out. I also cried a bit. It's funny how attached we became to our little family wagon. We brought Leah home from the hospital. Brought home our Christmas trees in her. Took family vacations. Bryce has drove in that car since he was 1! We were so sad to trade her in but this truck is going to be a blast for the whole family. We can tow the boat now. We are also looking forward to getting a truck camper and making tons of memories. I got demoted back to the old civic! One thing is for sure, we keep our cars for a long time and I think Bobby will have this truck until he's too old to drive it!

Now the kids are trying to name it. My dad has a black truck like it and he named it the "Black Pearl." So far Bryce wants to name her Shakira or The Babe, after Babe Ruth. Leah wants to name it Biebs, after Justin Bieber. My dad suggested The Great White Shark. One of those names will stick, and I really don't think it will be the Biebs.

Romance with the Kids

This year we didn't make any plans  for the big v-day. Bobby and I decided to not get presents for each other since we were trying to save up for a big purchase. Flowers still found their way to me and slippers to him. Guess it's the small little gestures that make us feel nice. I don't want to do the math in my head right now, but we have been together....for a long time. Since we don't have an actual day we can remember dating we celebrate our "together" anniversary on Valentine's day. We both worked during the day and I enjoyed seeing the kids do their celebrations at school. Somehow Bobby sent me one of the grams our school sells for the students. It was a sweet little delivery! Bryce was really sweet and wrote Leah the sweetest Valentine card. It is so "them" and it brought some tears to my eyes. We decided to go to dinner way early to beat the crowds. We really wanted to hang out with our little valentines too, so they came along to celebrate. We ate at my favorite restaurant, "The Lemon Leaf." Then we hit up the candy store. Topped of with a movie on the couch. Perfect day to celebrate love with the people in my life that make me feel that special daily.

Ditch Day

Bryce had a doctor's appointment "down below." It's funny that this is what people from the AV say when we have to head to LA. Since we were already half way there, I decided to make a fun day out of it and make use of our passes to Disneyland. My parents met me there. It was such a fun day! We were sad to not have Bobby there. Someone has to work I guess. The lines were short and I enjoyed every minute of ditch day. I love that every time we are doing something fun my kids thank me and tell me it was the best day ever. Even if we are just going to get ice cream, it's the best day ever, ha! We really had one of the best ditch days ever!

Masquerade Ball

We had a fun little evening out to celebrate Morgan's 50th birthday (my brother's mother-in-law). It was a ton of fun and of course spending time with my family and extended family is a bonus. It was a dinner cruise around the marina. Bobby surprised me and booked a room for the night. The kids loved staying in the hotel! The next day we went for a joy ride on my dad's boat. I was feeling well, for a change, and really had a great time. When we were out on the water, it was perfectly calm. Everyone was smiling and loving the day. I couldn't help but become taken over with emotion looking out at the vastness of the ocean and thanking God for a perfect day with people I love.