Thursday, July 11, 2013

I-I-I I Workout!

I decided when I turned thirty I was going to get into the best shape of my life. What a long journey this has been! My weight has fluctuated 40 pounds up and down since I graduated high school. When I first began, I wasn't very consistent with my workouts or diet. I finally got more serious in November of 2012 and started working with my trainer in January of 2013.

I know my body has changed, but I'm a normal woman and was feeling as though I still hadn't made enough progress. People will comment on how I look and to be honest, it is such a slow process sometimes I don't feel like much change has happened.

Bobby must have had enough of me talking about my progress, or lack thereof, and had me take a picture in a swimsuit to look at. Most women dread bikini pictures, and I am no different. I started to look back at old pictures of myself and comparing them to the one he took. This was so important to me because for the first time, I realized how far I have come! I am more motivated now to stay fit and keep going to shed some more body fat and pounds.
*Yes, I'm wearing sparkly heels...if you know me, you know I had to. **Yes I used a freakin' filter. I am a mom, don't be ridiculous ;) *** I was going to post a before pic, but ain't nobody want to see that!

There are some things I have learned along the way about myself and being healthy that I'd like to share.

1.) Just make up your mind and do it. Once you make up your mind you will have to keep making up your mind everyday, at every meal, at every workout. Sometimes your mind will say, "No way!" and it will take you to the In-N-Out drive thru. That's OK. Don't blow your whole day or week. You can make up your mind again and get back on track at the next meal.

2.) BE REALISTIC! Be realistic about your body type and shape. Be realistic about how long progress will take. Be realistic about your lifestyle and how this will all fit in.

3.) Do it for yourself. You really have to have a drive that says you are in competition with yourself. Besides all the people who will look better or be stronger than you, you will be a better version of yourself and that's what counts most. And you have to know it is OK to invest time in yourself!

4.) Celebrate EVERY POUND and success. Give yourself a pat on the back for every good decision you make. It's hard, you deserve to smile, no matter how tiny the victory is, it's HUGE!

5.) The smaller the goal, the better. I was so overwhelmed with my long term goal. I used to feel the same way about long drives. I would break the drive up by making it to certain monuments or exits and it seemed shorter. Everything seems manageable for a short period.

6.) Plan, plan and plan. Meal prepping helped me stay on track more than I originally thought it could. When my meals were already made, it makes it simple to make the better choice. Also, when I go out to eat, I make up my mind about what I'll have before I go. I look up the nutritional values and make the healthiest choice. We are a very social bunch and this part is important, as we eat out a lot. I wasn't going to bring in my own food, but I always have a plan for when we do go out. I pretty much know what I will eat at EVERY restaurant in town!

7.) Surround yourself with people who support you and cheer for you. Positive people can really keep you on track.

8.) Play tricks! I tell myself totally weird things, like that junk food will make me sick or give me food poisoning. And I believe myself.

9.) If you buy it, you will eat it. Seriously, I'm addicted to chips. I can't buy them.

10.) Don't deprive yourself. A little bit can go a long way if you crave it! Two chocolate kisses after a meal will do the trick!

This post will seem super positive and happy but the truth of the matter is, I really go through times where I am not positive at all about exercising and clean eating. I get down about progress and have low self esteem. But my attitude overall, about life and health and fitness has improved. And I am so thankful and proud of what my body can do! For example, I never thought I'd be running for 3 miles! I still don't love running, but feel the need and even crave a good run.

I still have months of work to reach my final goal. I thought it would be a good time to share my journey and how great I have been feeling. But I do mess up and cheat. I don't even want to call it cheating. I make a decision, that sometimes living is more important than cellulite. If we are celebrating with the kids at the ice cream shop, I am not going to sit that celebration out. I just get the smaller size now! I will not miss any of my kids practices or games or really anything in order to look better. Two hours in the gym a day is not really practical with our schedule. And I will still have an adult beverage to relax after a long week! But I do what I can, when I can to be healthy.

There are some people who I want to mention in this post about my journey because I think so many people will play a role in your success or failure in reaching any goal.

There is no way I would have stuck to it if I didn't have Bobby as my biggest support. The man is smart!! I am so glad he talked me out of doing fad diets and convinced me to only eat in a way I can maintain for the rest of my life. I will not drink shakes for the rest of my life or never again eat a carb. He really always took time to explain to me about balance. It also helps that no matter what weight I am, he whistles at me when I come downstairs after getting ready. I am lucky he always has made me feel good about myself! I also appreciate the fact he is dead set against surgery or quick fixes! I used to threaten that liposuction is much faster than this process. He convinced me that we are do it yourself people and this was no different. How easy is it to hire someone to do stuff around the house? How accomplished do we feel when we do it? He was right! I feel pretty proud of the work I put in. He is super patient with me, well, either super patient or can tune me out really good, especially when a Dodger game is on.

This journey of mine has really become a journey for our family to be aware of a healthy lifestyle. We still have fun and live, but we are always aware of foods and exercise. Some of my favorite workouts are as a family, whether it is riding bikes or having a dance party or just challenging each other. No better way to make it fun! The kids ask questions about eating healthy, and calories and exercise. I hope this has created a foundation for fitness in their lives.

My friends have played such a huge part in my fitness journey! It is so important to surround yourself with positive people who will cheer for you and pick you up when you are feeling down. My good friend Penny and I decided that instead of sitting at our kids' baseball practices and talking, we should run instead to try and get a workout in. I don't know how long I would have stuck to it if she wasn't encouraging me on days I didn't feel up to it. We really held each other accountable and made good use of our time. She is one of the sweetest people and I really would have given up if it wasn't for her.

Our husband's would probably tease us to no end if they could read the texts, my friend Melissa and I exchange in a day. She is so supportive and it is so fun to have someone to text what I ate for breakfast, lunch and dinner. We totally get each other and laugh and complain about the roller coaster that is dieting and exercise. I would probably be insane if I couldn't vent to her.

I am excited to talk about my trainer Jesse! This is one of the best investments I have made in myself. Women will spend money on so many things to make themselves feel better, let me suggest taking that money and putting it towards a better you. At first it was hard to justify adding the expense into the budget. Like many moms, spending money on themselves, instead of on their family, seemed like a foreign idea. Having a trainer started out as a luxury to me, but has become a necessity. My success couldn't have come without him. When you make a date with yourself and you know you are paying, you are less likely to cancel or come up with a reason not to go. I always knew he would be expecting me and I knew I had to fit it in- no matter how busy I was. The workouts are planned, he counts my reps and holds me accountable. It is a couple hours a week that I have to myself, and something that betters me. I always leave feeling a million times better than when I walked in, even when I can barely walk out because my legs are shaking. I really have developed a friendship with my trainer and can't say enough about his positive attitude and willingness to help others with their fitness journey. He definitely has found his passion and place in the world transforming people's lives.


OK, sorry if that was a little acceptance speech-ish. I thanked everyone but my mama! Speaking of my mama, my family is the most awesome cheerleaders. But they love me and cheer for me at any weight and always tell me I'm good enough already. I didn't win any award or trophy, I know, but just wanted to acknowledge some awesome people who have really made all the difference in my quality of life.


One of the most exciting things to celebrate is my health. My mental health and physical health has improved so much. People have asked me what I've been doing to lose weight so I thought I'd write about it and really share my excitement and passion for fitness. I really hope I can keep this up and that you will want to start, or keep up your hard work! I've lost 10% body fat and have 4% more to lose! Wish me luck!!





Tuesday, January 22, 2013

I Wanna Hold Your Hand

Recently, I experienced mom-heartache. Something so simple, marks the end of a period in time. I know the cliche about kids growing up before your eyes and to cherish things while you can. "You're Gonna Miss This,"  by Trace Atkins sums it up so nicely, in a way only country music can.

While I can't wait for my kids to grow up, I want to slow it down as much as I can. I'm excited for their futures and the possibilities of what they can become and do. In those ways, I welcome time passing. But then I realize that with each stage of independence, I have to say good-bye to the parts that make my babies....well, my babies. Too often we wish for them to be able to walk, only to miss them needing us to be mobile. I really do try to savor each stage, knowing they don't last for long. There were days, (mostly toddler days) when I wished they could be more independent, only because my life would become a little easier. There were days when I really wished we could just skip the tantrum stage and go straight to the well-behaved older kid stage, because surely at some age they act right! I love how when kids don't act right - it's a stage and when they do - it's because of wonderful parenting.

This moment is frozen in time....

It is a natural instinct for me to reach for my kids' hands when we are walking. I like to hold their hands. It's comforting. I never thought about what age they stop holding your hand. I mean, I know I don't see teenagers walking around the mall holding their parents' hands, but when exactly does that change?

Heart-break. While walking into the mall, I reached down and held Leah's hand. Right away she grabbed mine. With my other hand, I reached out to hold Bryce's. He held mine back. FOR LIKE A SECOND. He awkwardly and quickly pulled his hand away. I reached for it again and he evaded my search for his. I looked at him confused. He just smirked but his eyes looked sad.

I asked, "Don't you want to hold my hand?"

He shyly replied, trying his best not to hurt my feelings, " I DO WANT TO Mom, its just...." And his little voice trailed off.

I tried my best to keep it together. My little guy! My buddy! When did he get old enough to know it wasn't cool to walk around the mall holding my hand?

I said it's OK. I understood. He stated again. "I really DO like holding your hand, Mom, I just can't."

I think it really hit home about how old Bryce is getting. I couldn't be more proud of how intelligent he is, not only in school, but in life. He's compassionate and caring and even knew how to make me feel better about not holding his hand. He was always such a perfect baby and is growing into a well-rounded little person. He does well at whatever he tries, but is always eager to learn more. His mind is so open to new things and now his hands can be open to new things as well.

It is pretty symbolic. I mean, you have to let go of their hand at some point, right? I still reach down for his hand, without even thinking about it. He still pulls away and then smirks at me. I guess there is no going back now.

And while this milestone can bring me to tears, I'm OK. He's OK. And you know what? He will still come up to me (even in front of his friends) and give me the best, big hug. He holds on super tight and for a long time. I squeeze back as hard as I can, without hurting the poor boy, and I savor it. One day those hugs will be quicker, if they even exist at all when he's a teenager. I never knew you could be so happy about something and so sad at the same time, with one big sweep of emotion.

My baby is growing up.

8/14/2003 Bryceman 
                                                                   

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

Happy Friggin' New Year

We decided to have a party at our house for New Year's Eve. Well, not really. We had planned to go to my brother's house. The quickest thing you learn as a parent, is things don't usually go as planned. So, like I was saying, we had a lice party at our house.

The new running joke is that Leah got lice for Christmas. Along with her cousin Tynli. The family that plays together, gets lice together. This is the gift that keeps on giving!

I am really cautious about a lot of infectious diseases, but for some reason I never had a paranoia for lice. I have received notices home from school saying we had been exposed, but we never caught it. No one close to me (that I know of) has ever had lice. To me, it seemed hard to contract.

Well, now that we contracted it, it seems hard to get rid of. The work that goes into cleaning everything properly and perform head inspections is exhausting. After five days of treating Leah and the house, we really thought we were in the clear. I know the box said to retreat in 7 days, but I thought this was a precautionary tale about what happens if you don't clean like a mad lady, like I had. I was planning on retreating on day 7 anyway.

New Year's Eve (day 6 in lice terms) I'm doing my normal head check on Leah and discover that the lice isn't all the way gone. I start to freak out because I have been swimming in her hair all week. I assumed after the initial shampooing it will disappear. Wrong. Immediately, I have Bobby check my head. He said he wasn't sure but he thinks he saw something?

I go upstairs and do what any mother would do. I started bawling my eyes out. After a week of careful cleaning and head inspections, we had to start all over. Not to mention, lice gives me the creeps. I mean, I am not an insect lover to begin with and the thought of bugs and eggs (vomit) in Leah's hair and my own is enough to send me off a cliff.

Bobby comes upstairs, fully aware of my mental state and reassures me it will be OK. I'm pretty sure that it won't be OK because I can't stop crying. Then Bobby does what he does best and makes everything better. He said this is such a short period of time of discomfort and at least we had Leah here in the first place to search her head for lice.

And with that, everything seemed lighter. We would bring in the New Year, just us four, which with a big family doesn't happen often. No one wanted to come visit with our current state and I didn't blame them. We would watch a movie on the couch and get take-out since I was in no mood for cooking. The kids would stay up for the countdown, even though Bobby and Bryce both took a little snoozer before hand. It really was a special holiday because even in this unfortunate circumstance, we are so fortunate to have each other to laugh and live with.

And if I really could change it, I wouldn't choose to be away from our families at Christmas. We get to spend time with so many people we love and that may expose us to many things, but I would give Tynli a big hug regardless.

I'm still not sure if I full on have lice, but decided to treat both of our heads. This process for long, thick hair takes at least two hours. Bobby, being the wonderful husband he is, went through my hair for a couple hours to make sure I was in the clear. Insert many jokes here. Have I ever mentioned how important it is to be able to laugh with your spouse? We had to laugh through this experience a lot. The next couple days will be full of tons more laundry and plastic bagging everything we own, but I'm pretty sure this will be the end of lice. And the beginning of a new paranoia for me.

Looking forward to more of the same (minus lice) in 2013, with less cussing, more working out and more writing!