I have always viewed religion as something deeply personal. Something that does not need explanation or flaunting. I believe in letting your life speak for itself. When you love something it shows. I don't know if it is my age (I just past a pretty huge milestone) or if it because my mind does not shut off, but religion has been on my mind a lot lately. I thought writing it out will help me put some of these thoughts to rest. Does church make you a better person? I am not writing this to put people who attend church down. I am writing because this is the question that keeps popping up in my head. I struggle with this.
There are plenty of things I don't understand about religion. I will most likely spend the rest of my life researching the answers. I consider myself deeply spiritual. This doesn't mean I'm too lazy to go to church, but I have a hard time identifying with churches. I attend Catholic church when I go, which isn't often. I am debating about going more regularly, but struggle with many things about that. I was married in this church and my kids were baptised in it. I relate best to this, probably because it is what I know the most about and am familiar with. I am connected to this church through my belief in the bible, my family beliefs and soul searching. I like going and feeling connected to God and others who are believers. It makes my faith stronger.
Even when I do not attend church weekly, I pray, throughout my whole day. My kids say prayers every night. I thank God throughout the day for little things, like feeling healthy, having a car to drive, having money to buy the things we want and need, living in America, feeling connected to my family, etc.
I know verses of the bible and find great comfort in many of them, although I am not an expert and won't quote bible verses from memory. The belief seems to be that if you do not identify with a church and tie yourself to it closely, you are viewed as less religious. I am very secure in my beliefs and what I teach my kids. I don't think it is fair to make comparisons about who is closer to God based on appearances at church. Some people like to shout it from the rooftops and while I do admire that kind of passion, it isn't how I feel more spiritual.
I want my kids to have a strong faith, but there may come a day when they don't. I don't like to think that will happen but they are free to believe what they want. I want them to make their own decisions. I want them to question. I want them to find the answers to their own spirituality. I hope that what I teach them gives them a good enough understanding and faith. I wonder if church will help them or not. I've seen other people become more faithful through church, but I have also seen it make them less.
I struggle so much with many things with church. I'm not in a position to tell others how to live their lives. That is for each individual to decide for themselves. To live for themselves. If they don't believe in God, that is also between them and themselves.
It doesn't affect how I live, or MY relationship with God.
Judgemental attitudes draw me away from church. I have a problem when people feel higher than others based on beliefs. People preach about parts of the bible but leave out other parts. Bottom line, we are all sinners and I don't need to walk around and point out other people's shortcomings. Most of us know where we fall, in regards to where we are with our faith. I don't feel like Jesus would have wanted us to use him to feel superior. I feel that many times people use their voice to preach about the bible but forget to ask themselves how Jesus would have treated some of the people they are preaching about.
There are so many religions. Another thing I struggle with understanding. I don't discredit ones I don't belong to, because there are several interpretations of God's word. I use the bible and it's beautiful verses to live a better life. I want my children to know the love Jesus has for us. I want to use his example to live up to. Although we will all fall short, what a beautiful way to be, with compassion and forgiveness in your heart. I think this can be learned and strengthened through church, but I also feel it can be achieved at home, with less judgement. Do you follow EVERYthing from church or is it interpretive?
If something doesn't make sense to my heart, but it is in the bible, I follow my heart. Because in me, that is where Jesus lives. And Jesus and my heart would not mislead me.
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2 comments:
I think you're pretty right on target Jenny. In my opinion, church is a building & a building can't make you a better person. There are plenty of bad people who go to church and plenty of good people who don't. For me, I enjoy going to mass on Sunday. The ceremony & ritual of it feels right and good to me. When I walk in to church, I don't think about other people, how they view me, or judge them in return; I think of Jesus on the cross and all that God has given me. But Sunday is just one day of the week. There are 6 other days of the week to have faith & those 6 other days aren't spent in that building. Faith shouldn't be measured by attendence.
Miss your blogs, miss your post about your kids, I could always count on you to bring a smile to my face. It's not the same without your daily rants, posts, encouragement, mishaps that make you laugh. You are missed jenny. I only got to know a little of you, but fb made me feel like i knew u. You are such a blessing and I think of u and your family everyday.
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